I can safely say that thunderstorms are an entirely new experience living in a tiny metal box. Last night reminded me of just what that kind of experience could be!
Living in the southwest, rain is not something that occurs with great frequency, but last night - whoa... I was awakened around 3am to a very loud and bright thunder and lightening storm. At one point, it was so loud and long I could barely hear the train that blares its horn as it passes by. Sleep was not becoming much of an option.
But it wasn't just the noise that kept me awake. It was also those pesky thoughts of fear that are so happy to make their way to the forefront of your mind when you really don't need them...like 3am.
In the midst of it all it occurred to me that being in this tiny trailer amidst a storm was a lot like being afraid in the midst of an experience you can't control. I can't stop the rain, thunder, and lightening - but I am safe within its presence.
Fear is all about losing control and not knowing what the outcome will be. As the world around us is changing faster than any of us can keep up with, fear is a pretty normal response. This entire trip has made me continue to confront my fears because so much has been uncertain and out of my control.
Eventually the thunder stopped and was replaced by rain or ping ping ping - but sleep came in brief waves as the fear also receded long enough for my mind to find a bit of peace again.
Now that I am up, fed, dressed, and dry from the morning dog walk - the fear that grips one in the middle of the night doesn't feel so intense.
Part of creating this new world we are all working towards is to stop reacting against what we fear and instead work towards what we want to love. It is much harder than it needs to be. Yet, our minds are trained to focus on our fears the minute we engage the outside world and stop looking within to the truth that lies in our hearts and spirit.
Thunder passes and with it hopefully so will fear - both are just loud noises that keep us distracted from what we want, a little peace and quiet.
Welcome to my Journey!
I'm inviting you to join me on my journey as I seek to find a new way of being in an old set of systems. It's hard, but worth it!